Beat the sarcasm of Dr. House

What would Dr. House do... not to do to clinic duty?

His remedy is simple: walk up to the patients and unleash his dose of Housisms...

House: Hello, sick people and their loved ones! In the interests of saving time and avoiding a lot of boring chit-chat later, I'm Dr. Gregory House. You can call me Greg. I'm one of three doctors staffing this clinic this morning.
Dr. Cuddy: Short, sweet, grab a file.
House: This ray of sunshine is Dr. Lisa Cuddy. Dr. Cuddy runs this whole hospital so unfortunately she's much too busy to deal with you. I am a board-certified diagnostician with a double specialty of infectious disease and nephrology. I'm also the only doctor currently employed at this clinic who's forced to be here against his will. That is true, isn't it? But not to worry, because for most of you this job could be done by a monkey with a bottle of Motrin. Speaking of which, if you're particularly annoying you may see me reach for this. It's Vicodin - it's mine, you can't have any. And no, I do not have a pain-management problem, I have a pain problem. But who knows - maybe I'm wrong. Maybe I'm too stoned to tell. So, who wants me? (everyone stares) And...who would rather wait for one of the other two guys? (everyone raises their hands) Well, I'll be in Exam Room 1 if you change your mind. - [housisms.com]

For more Housisms follow this link: http://www.housisms.com/

My tribute to Dr. House

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I made this desktop wallpaper in honour of the great growling grumpy grunting glowering Dr. Gregory House played by Hugh Laurie. The show "House MD" has been an inspirational companion during all the lonely nights that I've spent attempting to progress towards completing my Post Graduate Dissertation. You really don't want to know what's it all about! I wish I could include this in my acknowledgment but then again... I let sanity prevail once in a while. So here goes... Thank you Dr.House... I'll make sure I'll triple check my doctor's diagnosis next time and spare him or her some 'Housism' on your behalf!